A young woman in my class named Sofia loves to “doodle” during our lecture for statistics. She’s extremely creative, and a self taught artist, like myself. I sparked conversation with her. I was interested in hearing her creative process because it’s very obvious her and I share similar symptoms when coping with math. Math gives me so much anxiety, I normally doodle to refrain my nauseous sensations caused by high stress levels. I tend to doodle in any situation or large environment I’m not comfortable in. It’s a measurement of self confidence. I produce something I can still be proud of in a class that constantly identifies me as a failure. Numbers, formulas, and equations overwhelm me, but I’m great at collecting data. I love to read and survey, and also interpret and analyze.
However, Sofia is not only a great artist, but also extremely intelligent in mathematics, and descriptive, especially when she participates in our lecture. As an outsider, I wonder how she can focus on the material, draw, and flourish when solving equations. She does not show any signs of stress when it comes to solving problems, but i discovered doodling eases her angst. I believe my work are doodles, hers are human figurines of anime, much more difficult. True art. I occasionally break focus to gaze her process in admiration
During our break I asked if she didn’t mind showing me some of her doodles, which she’d worked on during our lecture. I’m amazed, and she tells me she journals.She pulls out her doodle journal to show me. My void is completed, I immediately felt compelled to show and share my doodle journal too! She causually mentions “the problem is I can never finish a journal, I always buy new ones”. I’m so excited! I completely relate. She discusses her art work some more. I’m comforted by the discussion, especially in my highly stressful environment. Her work enamors me, her process occurs in our classroom.
As a creative I’ve noticed a common pattern amongst several artists. We struggle with mathametics or counting numbers. It’s a complaint commonly expressed in my creative fields. Many artists I know are identified or diagnosed with ADD, ADHD or dyslexia, but i stay away from such categorizations because I strongly believe many diagnosis are invented to marginalize intellect and diverse learning styles, preferences, and abilities. However, Sofia displays otherwise. She began to share …
Her work is inspired by Japanese t.v. shows. She freestyle draws because she has difficulty focusing with lecture if she’s not doodling or drawing. I agree..
Our last exam, she asked our professor if listening to music is allowed while taking a test. The reply was a polite no. Immediately, I remembered Spring semester, I was told by my professor to please remove my headphones during testing…
Music a common medicine for creatives.
my music that i love so dearly, it calms me down.
it’s unfortunate cheaters affected the coping mechanisms of creatives.
It’s also unfortunate that we don’t pay more attention to the needs of individuals with diverse learning preferences and styles..
I’m positive Sofia will pass the course, and move on,
as for me,
Art is a state of mind and being
I read my statistics book,
Solve the equations and then feel the need to vomit creatively,
I’m nauseous from math. I write, theorize, advocate, participate, dance, and
still i’m not enough
my list is long enough
I take the exams, and I return a failure
For this reason,
Art is a state of mind and being for
I produce something I can still be proud of in a class that constantly identifies me as a failure
my whole life.
i’m marginalized she
she asks, “do you draw everyday?”
she asks, “are you dancing this summer?”